Kirsan Unmasked

Someone from one of the alphabet agencies contacted me concerning an Above Top Secret picture of the shape-shifting FeeDay President Kirsan Illuminatus taken while he was traversing the universe with the Zeta Reticulians. When I asked Mr. Alphabet to name the organization he represents he said, “Only those on a need to know basis can be told, and you don’t need to know. Besides, if I tell you I will have to kill you.” It was rather easy to quickly decide I most definitely did not need to know. He did, though, inform me he was based out of Papoose Lake, which is more secret than Area 51. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgdp0pOSRtU)
After showing the startling picture we talked about other Above Top Secret locations (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2M9IYwIRPIM) before his gizmo glowed. “I’ve gotta take this,” he said. This was not any ordinary phone and unlike anything I have ever seen. “Mulder,” he said, while the gizmo floated in the air. Only he could hear the incoming voice. “OK Scully, I’m on my way.” He looked me in the eye and said, “Think long and hard about what you want to do with this,” before turning and running like a fox.
After thinking long and hard the decision has been made to share the picture with the chess world, even if it is the last thing I ever do.

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